Last Updated on April 17, 2025 by Arurhose
Finding contentment in our personal finance, how is it done? For many of us, “going big” means actively seeking wealth—working for that next promotion, investing strategically, or hustling day and night to build a net worth that can support our spending and early economic independence.
At the same time, there’s a growing undercurrent—people questioning whether it’s all worth it. Some argue that going small, or consciously reducing our life’s financial expectations, can eliminate a lot of stress. They talk about living simply, focusing on meaningful personal relationships, and limiting consumerism. Minimalism, financial independence with fewer outgoings, or “downshifting” to a simpler life is becoming more prevalent. Instead of dreaming about a sprawling mansion, there’s a different vision: a modest home in a nice neighbourhood, free from excessive monthly payments, less “stuff” to worry about, and more free time.
This tension—between big wealth and a simpler path—appears everywhere. “Which is better?” is not only about money. It touches on what we value most, how we approach our mental and emotional wellbeing, and what it means to be truly content. Should we go all out and “Go Big,” or is it better to plan on “Going Small” and setting more modest targets?
To complicate matters, life often doesn’t unfold the way we expect it. We get sick, the economy changes, our relationships shift. These uncertainties remind us that while personal effort and big dreams are admirable, part of our fate lies beyond our control. So, the question emerges: if so much is shaped by circumstances outside our direct influence, where should we focus our energy?
Lets look at the relative advantages of “going big” and living large—because there certainly are some—and then turn attention to the option of “going small.” We’ll see how real fulfilment comes more from clear values and self-awareness than from external signs of success. And we’ll talk about contentment: how a thankful mind-set, the practice of appreciating what we already have, and a deliberate approach to finances can free us to live with far less anxiety.
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The Obvious Advantages of Going Big
Before we get into the deeper discussion, let’s address the big dream: wealth, or “going big.” Many people equate success with financial abundance, large property portfolios, or simply the capacity to buy whatever they want without giving it too much thought. While it’s tempting to dismiss that as superficial, it’s undeniable that money can provide certain kinds of freedom.
Material Comfort and Convenience
We can’t pretend that having a hefty bank balance or an extensive investment portfolio doesn’t come with practical benefits. Wealthy individuals often have nicer homes in desirable areas, better access to high-quality medical care, and the resources to weather financial storms. If you can easily pay for quality private health insurance or a personal trainer, your physical wellbeing might be supported in ways that others struggle to afford. Whether it’s paying for premium education, upgrading your home’s security system, or taking regular restful holidays, going big can remove many day-to-day stressors.
Opportunity for Personal Growth
Wealth can also open doors for personal development. With significant financial resources, one might start a business, join leadership seminars, or invest in advanced degrees. This can catalyse further personal growth. If you have substantial savings, you can take a few months (or years) off work to pursue a master’s degree, volunteer for charity, or travel extensively to gain new perspectives.
Influence and Charitable Ventures
There’s also the philanthropic angle. With ample funds, people are often better positioned to donate to causes they care about or start their own charitable foundation. A robust financial position provides a larger platform to create social good—lobbying for change, offering educational grants, and more.
Freedom to Choose
On a basic level, wealth can allow you to pick and choose the shape of your life: do you want to maintain a high-flying job, or would you rather focus on passion projects and rely on your investment income? Money doesn’t bring guaranteed happiness, but it does provide more options.
Hence, going big shouldn’t be dismissed outright as a misguided quest. However, we must acknowledge the other side: big goals involve big expectations, and the path to high-level wealth is often strewn with uncertainty, stress, and the demands of external factors that we don’t fully control.
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When “Going Big” Is Not Entirely in Our Hands
Even if you decide you want that big net worth, the route forward can be fraught with obstacles—some of which lie outside your personal influence. That’s the crux of the challenge: you might want to pivot to a higher-paying career or set your sights on doubling your income, but does the industry have the openings? Does your current location offer enough opportunities? Do you have family responsibilities that limit your availability to retrain or relocate?
External Constraints
We often hear inspiring stories where someone overcame huge odds to succeed financially. But these stories rarely capture the complexities of everyday life for most of us—ill health, a family member who needs extra care, a partner’s job location, or a stagnant local economy. On top of these are broader forces: unpredictable market crashes, sudden job redundancies due to corporate restructuring, or shifts in technology that render entire industries obsolete. Anyone who has lived through periods of recession knows how quickly circumstances can swing out of our favour.
Mental and Emotional Wellbeing
Pursuing the “big life” can cause significant strain. Long hours at the office, high-pressure targets, the mental load of tight deadlines—these factors often affect health and relationships. Stress can accumulate, resulting in burnout or chronic health conditions, which ironically then disrupt the very path to success one was striving for. If “going big” sacrifices your ability to enjoy life’s simpler pleasures—your friendships, your hobbies, your time with your children—one could ask: is the price too high?
The Role of Luck and Timing
We don’t usually like to admit it, but luck and timing often play a key role in financial success. Being in the right place at the right moment, meeting a mentor who invests in you, or stumbling across a promising business opportunity—these can catapult you far. But they’re only partly within your control. You can work hard, network effectively, and remain alert, yet still never catch the “lucky break” that some others do. This factor, while not an excuse to give up, highlights that “going big” isn’t always as straightforward or guaranteed as motivational soundbites might suggest.
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The Appeal of Going Small
This brings us to the alternative: “going small.” By that, we mean actively reducing or moderating our lifestyle and financial independence expectations. Instead of trying to run a multinational business or own a fancy home in the trendiest neighbourhood, you opt to keep your parameters modest. Perhaps it’s living in a small but comfortable flat, working a stable job, and prioritising emotional health and simpler joys over climbing the rungs of success at any cost.
Lower Financial Stress
One hallmark of going small is the reduction of financial burden. If your monthly outgoings are modest, you may not have to hustle to earn a massive salary. You’ll typically have fewer debts, reduced mortgage repayments, and fewer “toys” to maintain—fancy cars, holiday homes, and so on. This can bring a tangible sense of relief. The less you owe, the less your finances weigh on your mind.
Freedom to Live on Your Terms
Interestingly, choosing to scale back can create its own form of freedom. When the cost of your lifestyle is lower, you can more easily switch careers, take a sabbatical, or cut back on your working hours to spend time on personal pursuits. In many ways, a “smaller” lifestyle can be a strategic move if your mental wellbeing, personal relationships, or spiritual growth are high on your priority list.
Focusing on What Matters Most
People who embrace a simpler life often claim that by eliminating distractions, they gain a deeper appreciation for the intangibles: personal growth, family, health, genuine friendships, and meaningful experiences. The mental clarity that emerges when you’re not constantly chasing the next pay rise or promotion can be profound. For some, this shift leads to a deeper sense of identity and alignment with core values.
Environmental and Social Considerations
You might also be drawn to going small out of a desire to reduce consumption and live sustainably. A smaller home means fewer resources used, whether it’s water, electricity, or heating. If you decide to drive a simpler car or even rely on public transport, your carbon footprint shrinks, and your monthly expenditures go down. In a world increasingly concerned with the planet’s limits, this can feel not only freeing but ethically responsible.
Overall, going small is an appealing antidote to the frenetic pace of consumerist society, particularly for people feeling disenchanted by the treadmill of “bigger is better.” Yet, minimalism and modesty also come with their own downsides, such as sometimes lacking the funds for emergencies or not having the resources to handle an unexpected job loss.
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Setting Our Own Parameters
So far, we have glimpsed how each side has its benefits and drawbacks. “Going big” can unlock resources and opportunities but can also be stressful and prone to forces beyond our control. “Going small” can offer relief from pressure and more mental space to be with loved ones but might impose its own limitations if we need larger sums of money for a crisis or if we harbour big dreams in a different direction.
Yet the core message here is that each of us must set our own parameters. We do not have to live entirely at the extremes. There is a vast spectrum between “mega millionaire” and “monk-like minimalism.” The crucial point is to understand the trade-offs: are you comfortable pouring loads of energy, time, and stress into a high-risk strategy for large rewards? Or do you value slower living, consistent moderate income, and fewer material concerns?
Defining Success for Yourself
First, examine what success means to you, personally. Is your idea of “making it” purely financial—owning a certain kind of house or reaching a particular net worth? Or does it revolve around relationships, creativity, health, spirituality, or service to your community? We often adopt assumptions from parents, peers, or popular culture, but these might not align with our deeper values.
Many people never stop to reflect on why they’re chasing a massive paycheck. Perhaps they want security, but they’ve equated security with a number in the bank. In reality, you might achieve a sense of security by building strong relationships, learning resilience skills, and maintaining a smaller but more stable income.
Balancing Aspirations with Realism
A middle path often emerges: you can aim for financial growth but do so steadily and sustainably. Instead of fixating on becoming a multi-millionaire in five years, you might invest in property or the stock market to create a moderate but growing passive income. You can still keep your day job, ensuring a steady stream of income while you build your future. That sense of balance alleviates the extremes of stress or deprivation.
Making Lifestyle Changes
Every parameter you set has practical implications for lifestyle. If you decide to go small, you might choose a simpler home, a second-hand car, or fewer nights out. If you aim bigger, your monthly outgoings may increase substantially—higher mortgage, membership in professional networks, child-care costs if you’re often travelling, etc. None of these choices are necessarily “wrong,” but they should stem from what you genuinely want your day-to-day life to look like.
At the end of the day, you can’t fully outsource these decisions. Financial advisers, family, or friends might suggest a path, but you are the one living it. Asking questions such as, “What do I want my mornings to look like?” or “How important is leisure time compared to building my business?” can help clarify which direction suits you.
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The Part We Can Influence vs. The Part We Can’t
Regardless of whether we go big or small, there’s a clear distinction between what falls under our control and what doesn’t. Recognising this difference can save us a world of frustration.
In Our Control: Habits, Actions, Mindset
Your daily routines, how much you save, your investment strategy, how you educate yourself about finance—these remain within your power. You can cultivate discipline, learn new skills to increase your employment prospects, or find creative ways to build a side income. You can decide to cook at home instead of eating out, funnel the saved money into an emergency fund, and set up an automatic investment plan. These consistent personal efforts shape your financial reality over time.
You can also choose to practise gratitude, adopt a balanced approach to consumption, or limit your exposure to social media if it triggers unhealthy comparisons. Yes, mental health struggles can complicate these efforts, but how you respond to everyday events—your resilience, attitude, and willingness to learn—remains (mostly) under your control.
Beyond Our Control: Economy, Health Surprises, Job Market Shifts
If the global economy crashes, your industry might face mass layoffs, or your business might fold. If you develop a chronic illness, no amount of positive thinking can fully override that reality. Similarly, if your region has few well-paid jobs, you might need to relocate to find better opportunities—or adjust your plans significantly.
Acknowledging these uncontrollable factors doesn’t mean giving up; rather, it means preparing for the unpredictable. Maintain an emergency fund, look after your physical health as much as you can, and nurture a network of supportive relationships. Don’t blame yourself for every setback, but do focus on solutions and coping strategies when adversity appears.
The Middle Ground: Negotiating with Reality
Sometimes, factors are partly within our control. For example, you might want a higher-paying job, but you don’t have the qualifications yet. If you retrain or pursue a diploma, you could gradually shift your career trajectory. That’s a negotiation between the present reality (insufficient qualifications) and your personal agency (the willingness and means to study). Recognising these partly controllable realms can stop you from feeling helpless and encourage you to take bold but realistic steps toward your goals.
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Who We Are: Shaped from Within, Influenced by the External
Our sense of self and ambition is in constant interaction with the world around us. To what extent should we let external norms—consumerist culture, peer pressure, or global economic trends—shape our identity and goals?
Internal Values as a Compass
A powerful approach to life is to anchor yourself in internal values—kindness, humility, creativity, contribution, gratitude—rather than external measures (like the size of your bank account or the brand of your trainers). This can be challenging in an age when external signifiers of status and success are so visible, but it’s a route to authenticity. If you’re guided by principles of honesty and compassion, you might shape your financial decisions around fair dealings, charitable giving, and sustainable investments. The direction of your life, then, becomes more stable because your compass is within.
External Influences: Family, Culture, Social Media
Of course, we can’t entirely block out external pressures. Family expectations can be strong—if your parents always wanted you to become a doctor or a corporate high-flyer, it can be hard to chart your own course without guilt. Cultural norms might prize home ownership or a certain level of material wealth. Social media bombards us with images of curated lifestyles. It’s naive to say these influences are irrelevant, because they can significantly affect how we see ourselves.
Instead, we need to filter these outside inputs. Ask, “Does this align with who I am and who I want to be?” If the glitz of social media is just stoking feelings of envy, limiting your screen time might help you refocus on your own values. Meanwhile, if your culture emphasises generosity or community living, you could incorporate those elements in your financial plans—like setting aside funds to help relatives or neighbours in need. The point is not to reject everything external but to assess it critically and consciously decide which influences to embrace and which to discard.
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Be Careful with Consumerism: Concepts We Let In
Consumerism—the culture of buying and accumulating more “stuff”—has become deeply ingrained in modern society. We often don’t realise how aggressively marketing has shaped our desires. Whether it’s the latest phone, car, or the “perfect” outfit, we’re bombarded with messages that we need more to be happy.
Recognising the Cycle of Consumption
Advertisements, social media influencers, and even well-meaning friends can push us into believing that owning certain items signals achievement or boosts our self-esteem. The trouble is, once the novelty wears off, we’re often left wanting the next new thing, creating a never-ending cycle. This leads us to ask: does chasing every gadget or luxury item truly bring satisfaction, or does it become an endless treadmill?
Discerning Needs vs. Wants
It might sound clichéd, but drawing a line between what you genuinely need and what is a fleeting desire can help you save money and mental space. That doesn’t mean never enjoying a treat—rather, it means being aware of whether a purchase aligns with your values and your financial plan. Sometimes, going small and focusing on fewer possessions can create a richer life experience by reducing clutter and freeing your mind for more meaningful pursuits.
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What It Means to Be Content
At the heart of this entire conversation—whether you prefer a big or small approach to finances—lies contentment. Contentment is that sense of satisfaction and inner peace with who you are and what you have at the moment, alongside steady aspiration for growth. It’s not complacency, but rather a posture of gratitude that diffuses the relentless anxiety of “never enough.”
Contentment vs. Complacency
Some worry that being content means losing your drive or ambition. Not necessarily. You can strive to improve your finances, career, health, and relationships while still practising gratitude and enjoying the present. Contentment is a calm acknowledgement that your worth is not dictated by external success alone.
Appreciating Progress Over Perfection
We often feel discontented because we set unrealistic bars for ourselves—obsessing about how far we have to go rather than appreciating how far we’ve come. If you’ve managed to pay down a portion of your debt, that’s a genuine milestone worth celebrating. If you’ve learned new budgeting habits or built a small emergency fund, it’s progress. Contentment reminds us that each small win matters and that we can be grateful for the journey.
Building a Fulfilling Life Through Non-Material Means
When you base your self-worth on intangible factors—kindness, empathy, creativity, connection—you become less susceptible to the consumerist trap of chasing the next big “thing.” Instead, you might glean happiness from developing a hobby, spending quality time with loved ones, or volunteering in your community. These experiences, ironically, often create more lasting joy than buying new possessions.
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The Role of Appreciation and Thankfulness
Linked closely to contentment is the practice of thankfulness. It’s one thing to say “I have enough,” and another to truly feel gratitude for what you have, from the roof over your head to the supportive colleagues or friends in your life. Thankfulness, in this sense, can transform your outlook—and, by extension, your relationship with money and ambition.
Why Thankfulness Matters
Gratitude shifts our focus away from what’s lacking and onto what’s already present. This recalibration has genuine psychological benefits, including reduced stress and increased happiness. When you’re thankful for your current job, home, or family, you are less likely to judge yourself harshly for not having more. This gentler self-view can still spark motivation, but motivation tempered by a sense of well-being, not desperation.
Thankfulness in Practice
How to incorporate gratitude into your life? Some keep a gratitude journal, jotting down a few items every day or week. Others share what they’re thankful for with loved ones at dinner or practise mindful meditation on the good things in life. In the context of finances, gratitude might look like acknowledging the privilege or the luck you already have—being able to work, having stable housing, or the opportunity to invest, even in small ways.
Balancing Thankfulness and Goals
Gratitude doesn’t mean you have to stop aiming higher. It simply means you’re recognising that life has already offered blessings. This combination—thankfulness for the present, coupled with hopeful steps into the future—can be a potent formula for happiness and growth. You’re less likely to make desperate financial moves if you feel stable and satisfied with your current footing. In that sense, gratitude can actually encourage better financial decisions.
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Bringing It All Together
The Freedom to Choose
Fundamentally, the discussion of going big or small highlights the freedom we have to define our lives. Yes, circumstances can impose constraints. Yes, the economy, health issues, or job market might limit our options. Yet within those limits, we still hold the power to shape our approach, set our priorities, and decide how much or how little we want to engage in high-stakes financial pursuits.
Some of you reading this might decide, “I do want to go big. I want to try my hand at starting a major company, or I want to own multiple properties.” That’s a valid choice—provided you understand the potential risks and are willing to endure the stress and possible setbacks. Others might say, “I’d rather keep things simple, scale back my expenses, and cultivate peace and minimalism.” That’s also valid. Or you might choose something in between.
Striking a Personal Balance
For many, the best path is somewhere in the middle: setting steady, growth-oriented financial objectives without letting them dominate every waking moment. Maybe you aim for a comfortable retirement plan, but you’re also happy to drive a mid-range car and live in a modest yet cosy home. You invest in experiences—travels, hobbies, time with loved ones—rather than chasing every corporate or consumerist marker of success. This balanced route can still build wealth over time while maintaining mental and emotional well-being.
The Underlying Values
Regardless of your chosen approach, certain values can keep you grounded:
- Self-Awareness: Understand why you want what you want. Is it a genuine passion or something you absorbed from society?
- Resilience: Life throws curveballs. Being prepared financially and emotionally helps you bounce back.
- Gratitude: Actively appreciate what’s already yours. It reduces envy, fosters positivity, and can make the quest for “more” feel less urgent.
- Integrity: Whether going big or small, act in ways consistent with ethical standards. Don’t sacrifice your morals for profit.
- Community: Consider how your financial pursuits impact others—your family, neighbours, or the broader society.
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A Deeper Reflection on Contentment: Moving Forward with Calm Confidence
One of the most overlooked aspects in conversations about wealth or simplicity is that sense of calm confidence—a quiet surety that you are enough, that you have enough, and that you can take the steps needed to move in a healthy direction. Contentment isn’t a one-time destination. It’s an ongoing practice, somewhat like physical fitness. You train your mind to see blessings, to acknowledge progress, and to be kind to yourself even when you make mistakes.
Guarding Against Comparison
Comparison is a major thief of contentment. Perhaps your friend is earning more and has just bought a lovely new home. Or you follow influencers who go on lavish holidays. The moment you judge your worth by someone else’s standard, you risk undermining your own contentment. So, part of living a contented life is consciously stepping away from constant comparisons. Remember that every person’s circumstances—history, family obligations, personal health, local job market—differ. Focus on your unique path.
The Myth of Overnight Success
Another pitfall is the illusion of overnight success, perpetuated by viral stories of people who “made it” seemingly out of nowhere. We rarely hear about the years of groundwork, failures, or small wins that preceded their “instant” triumph. Recognising that success—financial or otherwise—is typically a gradual process helps us stay content with smaller, incremental progress. This doesn’t mean giving up on big dreams; it means pacing yourself, celebrating each step, and preserving your mental health.
Rediscovering Joy in Ordinary Moments
When you’re not overly fixated on huge monetary goals or drowning in the stress of paying for an extravagant lifestyle, you may find joy in ordinary, daily moments. A good conversation with a friend, a walk in the park, a moment of reflection before bedtime—these small experiences often bring genuine happiness that money alone can’t buy. Paradoxically, even if you are on a quest to increase your wealth, taking time to notice life’s quiet blessings can keep you centred, reduce burnout, and make the journey more sustainable.
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Practical Suggestions for Balancing These Ideas
It’s one thing to talk about big versus small, contentment, and gratitude. But how do we implement them day to day? Here are a few suggestions:
Financial Self-Audit: Take a weekend to go through your monthly expenses, savings, and investments. Ask yourself if these align with your deeper values. Are you spending money on things you don’t genuinely need or enjoy?
Goal-Setting Session: Divide goals into short-term (6–12 months), medium-term (1–5 years), and long-term (5+ years). Include not just financial targets but also personal growth or relationship goals. This helps you see money as part of a bigger life picture.
Emergency Fund First: Whether you want to go big or small, do yourself a favour: build an emergency fund. Having three to six months’ worth of living expenses (or more) in savings offers peace of mind and a buffer when life’s storms hit.
Mindful Consumption: Try a 30-day rule for non-essential purchases. When you feel the urge to buy something, note it down, and wait 30 days. If you still want it at the end of that period, consider purchasing it. Often, the impulse fades.
Express Gratitude Regularly: This could be a morning or evening practice where you mentally (or in writing) list a few things you’re thankful for that day. It shifts your focus toward the good in your life, setting a more positive tone.
Nurture Healthy Relationships: Whether you have big or small ambitions, your relationships matter. Spend time and resources on cultivating friendships and connections that inspire and uplift you.
Stay Flexible: Understand that life circumstances change. If you’re forced to scale down, it’s not necessarily a failure; it might be the prudent move for that season. Conversely, if an opportunity arises for you to grow your wealth significantly, be prepared to adapt your plans.
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The Takeaway: Contentment and Choice
When we strip away societal pressure and the noise of consumer culture, we discover that both “going big” and “going small” are, in many ways, personal choices. They are shaped by your risk tolerance, health, relationships, experiences, and, critically, the values you hold. If you decide that pursuing a large income, multiple properties, or a high-flying career is genuinely fulfilling—and you’re prepared for the challenges—then there’s no shame in chasing that vision. If, on the other hand, you find yourself craving simpler living and choose to intentionally shrink your expenses, your home, or your hours at work to invest more in your personal life, that is also a valid, fulfilling path.
Both routes can be derailed or reinforced by factors you can’t control: market downturns, layoffs, personal illness, or family crises. Both routes can be enhanced by a grateful mindset, consistent effort, and attention to what truly matters—connections, well-being, and a sense of purpose.
Ultimately, contentment arises from feeling at peace with the route you choose—and that peace is easier to cultivate if your daily decisions align with your core beliefs. If your dream is to become financially “FAT-FIRE” (fully financially independent, retire early with a luxurious lifestyle), be transparent about the level of discipline and risk that entails, and build a strong plan to cope with downturns or personal stress. If you dream of a “LEAN-FIRE” approach where you spend very little and live modestly, embrace the sense of peace that minimalism can bring. In both cases, you’ll notice that a thankful heart, the ability to adapt, and trust in your capacity to weather life’s storms make the journey more sustainable and rewarding.
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Final Thoughts
There’s no single right answer to whether “going big” or “going small” is better for you. Each path can yield benefits but also come with costs. We all harbour personal values, limitations, and unique talents. The crucial piece of advice is this: live intentionally. If you chase wealth, do so because you truly want to, recognising the stress it may introduce. If you prefer a simpler life, embrace it wholeheartedly, understanding that you might need to make do with fewer luxuries.
Neither approach guarantees immunity from hardships. Unexpected health issues, family crises, or economic downturns can shake the foundation of even the best-made plans. But the more you align your finances with your authentic priorities, the better positioned you’ll be to handle those challenges—and to remain content despite them.
Most importantly, remember that real contentment often flows from gratitude for what we already have, especially intangible blessings like supportive friendships, fulfilling relationships, personal integrity, and good health. When we approach life—whether big or small—with an attitude of thankfulness, we’re far less likely to be tossed around by envy, social comparison, or fleeting trends. Instead, we become grounded, knowing that who we are and what truly matters can’t be bought or sold, only nurtured from within.
If there’s a takeaway, it might be this: contentment is possible in either world—big or small—as long as you’re willing to practise thankfulness, keep perspective on what you can control, and allow yourself to appreciate the present while you strive for the future. That balanced, grounded approach is perhaps the greatest wealth of all.